We can still make references to Frozen, right?
Have you ever been on a deep dive into the personal development space, maybe searching for something specific you’re struggling with? And every Insta-guru out there just keeps telling you to ‘release it’.
Take that pain, frustration, fear, etc, and release it. Hell, I may have said it a few times.
When you hear that term, RELEASE, does it make sense to you? Do you know how to give something up? Especially something abstract, like a thought or a feeling.
How do you release?
As I’ve typed this word out repeatedly, I can’t help but see the breakdown — REL — EASE. When we can let go of the control we think we need to have over something or allow a higher power to take what we can no longer handle, then we can find Real Ease in our day-to-day.
So let’s talk about this holiday time. There are lots of ways you might be trying to make magic for your family, the experiences, the presents, the songs, the cookies, all of it. But we can’t necessarily make other people feel a certain way.
We can break this down into goals and intentions. Full disclosure, this post came to me from listening to an Abraham Hicks YouTube Video and reading an email from the Sisters Enchanted.
So our to-do list/goals:
- make the cookies
- go to the concert
- decorate the tree
Those are just things we have to do, they take up enough time and energy and patience to get through it with a family all on their own.
Ask yourself WHY are you doing those things? It could be tradition. Making memories? Finding the joy in each day? Holding on to the magic of the holiday?
Great, those are your intentions, your reasons why you go through the motions and the exhaustion to get all the things done.
The problem here is that if we try to do all the things on the to-do list AND control the idea that you and your family WILL make good memories, YOU WILL make your kids think this is magical, you will FORCE yourself to be joyful, well, that doesn’t sound all the fun and joyful to me.
So let’s release that.
Take a piece of paper, maybe even your planner where you’re writing down all your to-dos.
Make one column for your list of things to accomplish for the day/week/month.
Then in a separate column list what the universe can help you with. RELEASE the intentions and big ideas and feelings, and delegate those concepts to a power beyond your control.
Say to yourself, ‘I’ll bake the cookies, go to the store, pick up the cards. Universe, you’re in charge of bringing the delight for the day, send me something really joyful, and help my kids to see something magical today.’
Now that’s off of your plate, you don’t have to be in charge of it anymore. You released it and now you can have real ease in your day.
Let’s take a slightly harder concept to try.
Maybe the holidays bring up a lot of expectations for you. You worry about going to see family and what people think of your kids' behavior and your parenting, maybe someone is always judging your cooking, or maybe you don’t get your kids super expensive gifts as your in-laws do.
Does that list of expectations and worries feel like a belt around your waist tightening up? Maybe like a weighted blanket on your shoulders that just keeps getting heavier?
Let’s release it.
What are you in charge of?
- Going to the place (and even then you don’t actually have to, but family is tricky).
- Bringing a dish to the potluck
- Parenting your kids the way you feel is best
- Keeping your budget in check
What can we put the universe in charge of? Universe, you’re going to be in charge of:
- Helping me see ways to feel safe in uncomfortable situations
- Throwing away all these worries (write them out and burn them up)
- Bringing me opportunities to connect with my kids
When you’re on your way to the family gathering you can remind the universe and say, ‘hey, remember you’re keeping me safe here, show me how to find ease at this place.’
Now all you have to do is look for it. Look for a way to find comfort. Look for the magical moments. Look for ways to get connected. They will be there, but you will have to keep your eyes open looking at the world around you instead of being stuck in your head overthinking all the things, that’s how we miss them.
It’s a good thing if this seems basic. These are just constant reminders to help you get through each and every day with REAL EASE.
